Off the top of my head I am thinking... the sense of accomplishment, extra dark chocolate, and REAL conversations.
These aren't things that I just love a lot...they are things that I feel the need for in my life.
I have recently gone through a season of "pruning" where God stripped me down to my bare self and then basically asked me who I was. What are the blocks that build me, Rachel? Oh boy...I was so off base. Hind sight is 20/20 as I see what God was slowly taking out of my life in order to find myself. One thing that has remained strong and keeps building is my desire for real conversations.
Let me first define what I think "real conversations" are; they are not superficial, they skip the small talk, they contain awkward subjects, they make you uncomfortable, they light a fire in you, they require eye contact, they challenge everything you ever considered, they are frequently inconvenient, they leave you encouraged, and they are best enjoyed over a cup of coffee.
The best thing about real conversations is that they don't have to happen with people you are close to. A few weeks ago, I ran into a woman at my church who is a few years older than me. We were in youth group together years ago, though I had never really known her more than connecting a face to a name. Well, we are both on youth staff this year and so we saw each other more frequently. We gradually talked more and more, but I never sought her out to talk. On Christmas Eve, we passed in the lobby of church and we got into a conversation about how she was moving to Europe at the beginning of the year. We talked about all the things she is going to do in London and I was not very good at hiding my jealousy. She asked about my life and I remember being so encouraged after talking to her because she listened not only with her ears, but with her eyes and her face. She and I were talking in the midst of tons of people, but were totally focused on our conversation. (I WANT TO LISTEN LIKE THAT!) Since it was toward the beginning of the holidays, we parted with a quick promise to grab coffee together soon.
Well...it is now January 6th and we still haven't grabbed coffee. The thing that strikes me isn't that we never actually got coffee...people make so many unfulfilled promises to catch up (I am unfortunately not exempt from that)... but it's the fact that I am craving that type of conversation. I sat with her in church yesterday and while the message was awesome, I couldn't wait for it to be over so I could hear her progress with her London trip. I am totally struck with her confidence, trust and peace in God. She is waiting on her visa to travel. Meanwhile, she already quit her job and is selling her car today. Talk about having trust that God will provide.
We made plans to get coffee on Friday. I can't wait.
So what does that have to do with craving real conversations...and why is that important in the first place?
Well...I believe God created us to be in fellowship with one another. I do NOT think fellowship is gossip or a quick "Hi!" or a shallow conversation. God wants us to share in our suffering and joy. This means we are frequently vulnerable...and that is a beautiful thing. The more I experience this type of fellowship, the more I want it. There really isn't anything better than connecting with another believe and sharing life. Naked, hard, fulfilling life. Not only do you learn from others and get to encourage them, by vocalizing your own thoughts, you learn and grow from your own experiences. There are so many times when I am talking about something that I have gone over a million times in my head but as soon as it comes out of my mouth, it hits me in a new way. I think that is one of the coolest things ever.
"Summing it all up, friends, I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies." Philippians 4:8-9 (The Message)
Have you had a real conversation lately? If not...why?
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